the "mild annoyances" thread

Discussion in 'Sodom' started by inexpediency, Nov 17, 2011.

  1. Almost Human

    Almost Human Mightest of the Drunks Staff Member Bürgermeister

    I could never refuse you, inex

    Who he is:
    As a child, Signhere's parents were tragically killed when their illegal moonshine operation exploded during a magical shoot out with local elven law enforcement.

    Deciding that these forests were no place to raise a child, Signhere's grandmother bought a house in a small, predominantly human village. Worried their names would be ‘too elvish' for their new home, and with a poor grasp of common, his grandmother opted to simply borrow the names of the previous tenants as listed on the deed.

    Thus Signhere Ironshield and his grandmother, Surname Ironshield, lived quietly amongst the baffled villagers for a number of years without incident.

    Then puberty struck.

    Unfortunately, unbeknownst to either of them, their family carried a strong streak of magic in their words and while casually practicing his latest pickup lines at the Happing Pig farm, a previously apathetic sow became enamoured with the careless youth. Unable to shake the beast he was forced to explain what happened to the farmers. This incident caused the pig's previous favourite person and aspiring wizard Clifford Happing to declare Signhere his rival and vow revenge.

    Determined to humiliate his new enemy, Clifford issued a challenge; a singing competition. When Signhere arrived at the arranged time he found that his competitor was not in fact the Happing youth, but the infatuated swine, who had been enchanted with the voice of an angel. Fearing the enraged young elf would attack him physically, Clifford prepared a spell but in the last moment the pig jumped between them. In a blinding flash Clifford and the pig had become one, and with a mind torn between his absolute love and endless hate for Signhere, he ran away.

    Things were calm until a few years later news reached the village of a singer filling opera houses around the world named SwineLord Half Pig, who was said to have the voice of an angel. Signhere saw this as a challenge and was determined to put an end to this rivalry, either through song or through bloodshed, but he grandmother demanded he stay. The two fought and the old elf’s heart gave out, her final words unintentionally cursing her grandson: “You do as your Grandmother says!”

    Now Signhere is free to pursue his music and his rival, although when an old elven woman asks him to do something his finds himself unable to refuse.

    Why would someone like that go on an adventure?

    Your private performance for a small group of young, wealthy high elves is suddenly interrupted as an ancient elven matriarch bursts through the doors.
    “William LocalLeaf! What is going on in here??”
    The room is silent as the party’s host turns bright red.
    “Mom, I told you I’m just having a few friends over-”
    “FOR A GOODBYE PARTY!” She screams, the guests scattering as she pushes into the room. You look around frantically. You might be able to make a run for it, but you won’t get paid. Or laid. Also it looks like all the best hiding places have already been taken.
    “W-well yes, but-“
    “You’re not yet even 50 years old! You’re too young to go adventuring!”
    “Mom, please, I already accepted the job and they’re expecting me there and it’s just some dumb hermit in some dumb castle and I-“
    “And you what? You think you can kill him? You threw up for a week after accidently hitting a squirrel with your carriage. You! With the weird folding piano!”
    “It’s an accordion.”
    “They’re expecting an elf and they’ll get one. You’re going in his place. William will write down all the instructions NOW and here’s all his allowance for the next month.”
    “What?? That’s MY allowance! I’ve done all the dishes ALL WEEK.”
    You open your mouth to say no, to tell her to stick her instructions, money and loser son all in the same place. You attempt to eke out a single sound of protest but you can’t. You physically cannot stop yourself from accepting the money, some angrily written directions and a very insincere thank you.
    By the time your voice returns you’re already on the road, your feet forcing you away from all the paying jobs, warm beds and unspeakable adult situations that your trade offers, to fulfill the wishes of an old woman you will no doubt never see again.
  2. inexpediency

    inexpediency Ruler of this [CHAT]

    AH only you would make a backstory like that

    and it is brilliant

    I want to hear all about his adventures forever
  3. Triangle Man

    Triangle Man Cautiously Optimistic

    Well, it sounds like things are getting rocky with the group. It will take time to sort out, but I have every confidence that you will!

    Also that backstory is amazing and I want to know more about the amazing and wonderful character because it pleases me. Also because Inex will probably blow up the forums or something if you stop.
  4. Almost Human

    Almost Human Mightest of the Drunks Staff Member Bürgermeister

    Haha well I'd love to but he doesn't really have any other adventures right now. He's take a quest to hunt down a recluse in an old castle from William Localleaf's doting mother and...
    Well...
    That's it.
    We woke up after that, got bullied by our teammates, magically tethered together, told to shut up and got dragged along as though on a leash. I have other ideas I've been kind of drawing out as backstory involving him tracking down the Operatic Pigman while I sit at my computer waiting either to roll my next useless combat roll or for the dm to stop having secret meetings with the railroader, but presently there is no adventure, only tedium. Sigh.
    I'll letcha know on Sunday if there's more than that. Otherwise Signhere may be lost to my pile of unused D&D characters and his tales may only be told through dumb sketches and silly side thoughts.
  5. gingerale

    gingerale Dread Pirate

    Ahhh, AH, I love your character! I hope I get to one day play D&D 5e with you. ♪

    My characters are very boring in comparison.
    Like my new one for a campaign with friends, Gabriel Topalov.
    Gabriel Topalov has spent his entire youth living up to the expectations of those around him. His parents, both well known politicians from families of high prestige, have been doing their best to make sure Gabriel, along with his younger sister, will follow in their footsteps. But it has been a hopeless task. Even though he has followed their guidance and education through his life so far, he has made it very obvious he's only been doing it out of respect for his parents.

    Gabriel has never felt too interested in deciding things for others. And due to his position his antics have been publicly available for the general public through tabloit reporters. Through them he has been both hero and embarassment of the public, depending on who you ask. This has made Gabriel rather paranoid about crowds, causing him to embrace solitude, and to try to meet very specific, unrealistic appearance.

    Once well into adulthood and Gabriel's studies finished with grades he considers "good enough", he took his motorcycle, one he has affectionately named Charlene, and rode into the wide world. For years he had prepared this. Learning to hunt with the bow and gun. And now he finally felt free. Although gods and magic is long lost and gone in the day and age, somehow adventure still manages to come knocking. So he, and a few others from various points in the past and future, are tied by fate into a war through time. Gabriel with nothing but his backpack of traveling gear, keys to his motorcycle, and a very fine leather jacket.

    "Am I glad they forced me to study ancient draconian."
    -- Gabriel Topalov, Uknown Era
  6. Almost Human

    Almost Human Mightest of the Drunks Staff Member Bürgermeister

    Ah sorry I missed this message before! I'm having a much better time with my group now but I worry. One guy wants to post recording s of our playthroughs online which is kind of weird, although his first cut was hilarious. I don't want our sessions to be geared towards an audience rather than having fun.
    Either way yeah I'd love to play with you guys sometime too!

    Your character sounds quite fun! What kind of campaign are you playing that you can have a motorcycle?
    My characters tend to be built more towards stories than stats so I admit I'm not usually too helpful in battle. It sounds like your character can hold his own.

    I'm in a work meeting right now and its soooo dull. As usual. Our CEO rambles and drones about nothing. Also this is typed in my phone with tiny text so it's probably riddled with errors and I apologize
  7. Triangle Man

    Triangle Man Cautiously Optimistic

    From the looks of it, a really awesome time-travel campaign.

    That does not sound like a fun meeting. I mean, I'd have a hard time with that sort of situation.

    My brain is still being a pest today. That is all.

    P.S. - Don't wory abot speling msitakes. :)
    Last edited: Feb 5, 2016
  8. Almost Human

    Almost Human Mightest of the Drunks Staff Member Bürgermeister

    I know those feels, my brain shut down for half of today and I kept saying "We have to do things, this is one of our two only days off before shit hits the fan" but ugh, I still lost half a day to nothing.
    Sometimes brains SUCK.
  9. gingerale

    gingerale Dread Pirate

    Well my DM is very combat oriented. So I have to make sure any character I make is able to deal with her custom boss encounters. Though a lot of it involves blowing things up so it's quite fun.

    And it's a time travel thing. The story supposedly will go between different eras of a world. I doubt I'll get to bring the motorcycle to the past though.

    Ah dang, I hope your work gets better. My work hours are too inconsistent for me to get invited into meetings, haha. But hey, try to manage there!
  10. Triangle Man

    Triangle Man Cautiously Optimistic

    @ AH - I agree with Gingy on this. I also can relate to my brain just shutting down because that's been happening too much lately. That, and last night basically became a maelstrom of lost sleep and new endless anxiety. I'm feeling (somewhat) better now, however.
  11. Captain Zaven

    Captain Zaven ribbed for her pleasure

    hahahahahahahahahahaha

    it wasn't good enough that they kicked me out of pharmacy school but they also made sure to cancel my microsoft office subscription post-haste so that i can't open slash edit my resume for the job that i gotta find

    what considering that i just flunked out of grad school
  12. Triangle Man

    Triangle Man Cautiously Optimistic

    I'm pretty sure that that's the exact definition of 'rubbing salt into the wound'. Which is to say that it's complete bullshit and I hope that you find a solution to all of this ASAP.
  13. inexpediency

    inexpediency Ruler of this [CHAT]

    oh man that's awful :(
  14. NotAPumpkin

    NotAPumpkin Game maker and tie breaker

    Oh nooo Zavs :(

    That's such shit, argh.
  15. Almost Human

    Almost Human Mightest of the Drunks Staff Member Bürgermeister

    I'm so sorry, Zaven! If it helps at all Open Office or OfficeLibre can do most of the same stuff :( I know that's not the point though
  16. Almost Human

    Almost Human Mightest of the Drunks Staff Member Bürgermeister

    Augh I'm all messed up.
    I'm excited for the deadpool movie but I'm so bad at talking about it out loud still which is making me angry. I can't remember if I told you guys about my history with deadpool and the comic/game store guy refusing to sell me comics because I liked "shitty rip off characters" but somehow it's stuck with me that talking about deadpool out loud will get me in trouble.
    So now, like a mature, well adjusted adult, I feel sick to my stomach when I try to talk about the movie or people have questions about the character.
    The worst part? My shit went down over 15 years ago. That guy probably doesn't work there anymore and the store has amazingly glowing reviews online, a lot from young girls.
    So I don't know. I guess I'll just be stupidly messed up forever.
  17. Triangle Man

    Triangle Man Cautiously Optimistic

    As someone who lets other people's negative criticism of media get under their skin way too much, I think I have some idea of what you're feeling here. And that sort of feeling can just really suck the fun out of things that should be fun in the worst way.

    As you've said to me before, though, it's probably best to not worry too much what other people think when talking about or liking the things that you like. That's not as easy to do as you'd think, but it feels good when you can pull it off.
  18. gingerale

    gingerale Dread Pirate

    I'm guessing that idiot you met is now all over Deadpool finding him the most awesome character ever and "has never been of a different opinion." I hope you enjoy the movie, AH. I hear it's really, really good. And respectful towards people.

    I'm afraid of going to see any movies or buying anything right now. Social Insurance folks from the government sent me a letter telling me that they're demanding the student aid from 2014 back because my studies haven't gone ahead well enough. And it's an over 1700 eur bill. Something that I don't have, especially after rent.

    I'll try to appeal for reprocess and see if I can at least get the time to pay it back extended.
  19. Almost Human

    Almost Human Mightest of the Drunks Staff Member Bürgermeister

    Ah it's not quite the same thing. I probably didn't explain very well, I was kind of drunk. These days, at 28 years old I don't care what people think about the things I like. I'm an adult, no one can intimidate me into not listening to a certain kind of music or seeing a movie or whatever.
    But back in 1998 when I was being kicked out of the only comic store within a 20 minute drive by a much older, much larger, screaming neckbeard for trying to buy the first solo run of a 'rip off character' it stuck with my 11 year old brain that if I liked deadpool it had to be a secret. Out loud that is, it's easy to type about while hiding behind an avatar.
    I know it doesn't make much sense, that was ages ago and I should be over it but something in my most basic brain still feels kind of ill when I try to talk about him. Like I'm going to get in trouble again like I did as a kid.

    I don't doubt for a second that you're right. I started to notice a weird deadpool boom a few years back amongst comic fans that made me raise an eyebrow. I'll never know what that guy thinks, since honestly I don't even know his name and can't go back to the store and see if he's terrorized any other young people that don't fit into his perfect nerd-sphere (wrong age, wrong gender etc etc) but the reviews for the store these days suggest that everything is going swimmingly for them so he's probably long gone.
    To be honest I don't know if he even hated Deadpool so much as he hated me. I know he picked fights with me later about Superboy as well (to which I again, as my late 90's incarnation, completely and utterly failed to defend myself) and even later than that Red Sonja.
    After that he just refused my business and I could only buy stuff on days he wasn't working the counter, and it's not like my parents were willing to drive me in all that often.
    ANYWAY

    Jeezes that's terrible! How are they just allowed to do that? And is there any way to get it on a payment plan like we have out here for student loans? I've been paying my 20k education bill back for years, but thankfully in small chunks at a time :(
    I'm so sorry to hear that.
  20. NotAPumpkin

    NotAPumpkin Game maker and tie breaker

    Awww, I hate to hear about people's bad experiences with nerd culture. What a bully! Also, he refused you business? That is...not a very sound business practice. What an ass.

    I can really relate to the paralyzing anxiety that comes with talking about things we like...I'm actually completely terrified of expressing an opinion or that I like something unless I know in advance that whoever I'm talking to will be receptive. That's probably cause my older brother bullied me relentlessly about everything I did when I was a wee tyke.

    Some things are I guess safer to admit to liking, like I wouldn't have any trouble saying I like Final Fantasy, but the more obscure it is the more squeamish I get about it. And I almost never bring up comics because I don't know enough about them to defend my position if challenged.

    Ugh, I guess it's really hard to let go of formative experiences...it's such a shame, especially since we have so little control of our circumstances as children. Sorry you had to go through that, man, it must have been really awful to meet someone like that :(

    Yo, and good luck ging, I hope money woes don't bog you down too much...

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